Archive for November, 2008

Feeling Thankful

Friday, November 28, 2008,

Yesterday was Thanksgiving Day in the United States, and this year especially I had plenty to be thankful for. Although a bit creaky at times, I am in generally good health, as is my husband of 41 years (and he is still my husband, which in itself is cause for gratitude). Both our children are happily married, and their spouses are both gainfully employed in relatively secure occupations. Our son is back in school for a second degree that is expected to enhance his earnings potential, and our daughter is scheduled to make grandparents of us in April. We’re both usefully employed in ways that bring sufficient remuneration for our “retirement” years, and, although I suppose no one is completely recession-proof, we are less affected by the current economic meltdown than most. Our house, bought in 1980 for a sum that now appears risible, is fully paid for. Thanks to a nice legacy that is safely “invested” in an interest-bearing bank account, I am financially better off than I’ve ever been (though that doesn’t keep me from sighing over the statements from my broker that show my IRA continuously tanking). Even more important, we both have avocations that bring us a considerable measure of satisfaction because they include a volunteer service component.

So, yes, there’s much to be thankful for. But what I am most thankful for today is that Thanksgiving is OVER! I suspect I have always regarded it as something of an ordeal, even when I wasn’t responsible for it, but this year, for the first time within recent memory, I was the sole writer, director, and producer of this production, and it is a lot of work!

The first year we were married (1967), my husband and I went to his home (150 miles away) for Thanksgiving, establishing a tradition that continued until his mother died in 1996. There were a few off years early on when my husband was still in graduate school and, for whatever reason, decided he couldn’t get away for a weekend. One time we celebrated Thanksgiving with friends (I cooked a duck for the first and last time ever—what a disappointment!), and another time, not wanting to be depressed by eating turkey and dressing in a restaurant, we had burritos at our favorite Mexican place (because it was the only restaurant open that was not serving a traditional Thanksgiving feast). And one year, much to his mother’s relief, we invited his parents to celebrate with us here. But mostly we drove to my husband’s hometown (250 miles from where we now live) every year on the fourth Wednesday in November.

After my mother-in-law died, my mother (who had moved here in 1991) took up the slack. After her death in 2002, I suppose we must have had Thanksgiving here for my father and father-in-law a time or two, but I suspect I bought a lot of the feast readymade. For several years after that, their church had a potluck dinner to which I took a couple of my pumpkin pies and a vegetable casserole, and the four of us shared with other parishioners who had no family nearby. That era ended when the pastor who had instituted the custom accepted a call to another church.

Last year some childhood friends of my husband’s, now living in our area, invited us to join them. This year we received no such invitation, so, although we could have just gone out to a restaurant, I decided to go the whole nine yards for just the two of us. At least that way we would have leftovers!

I was inspired by the recipes in the November 16 issue of Parade magazine and decided to make several of them. This was easier said than done. I started at Wal-Mart, where I spent an hour and a half battling the mobs (on Monday, so these were neither weekend nor last-minute shoppers) and came out without several key ingredients. I quickly abandoned hope of finding “fresh” turkey breast anywhere (my regular supermarket did have some thawed turkey legs but no breasts), so I decided that “brined turkey breast” was a newfangled idea I’d save for another time (one factor in my decision was a suspicion that the decidedly odd taste of the turkey we had at Rotary last week was the result of “brining”). What Wal-Mart did have was frozen turkey breasts that boasted “freezer to oven” convenience—no need to thaw. They were available in a variety of brands and “flavors,” but all about the same size—three pounds. I rejected the smoked turkey as being nontraditional and the “Cajun” as being too risky; although the label didn’t specify what “Cajun” meant, I suspected it implied “spicy-hot,” a sensation I can do without on the classic celebration of blandness that is Thanksgiving.

Wal-Mart also had no fresh cranberries—at least not one-pound bags of ordinary cranberries, only 7-ounce baskets of pricy organically grown ones—so it hardly mattered that I also couldn’t find fresh ginger. I did later find both cranberries and ginger at my regular grocery, and I must say that the Ginger Cranberry Sauce was the highlight of the meal.

Through some confusion (I evidently misread the scale in the produce department), I inadvertently bought twice the required amount of sweet potatoes. After having one of them for lunch, “baked” in the microwave, a process that resulted in an underdone potato even after I’d cooked it twice as long as the cookbook called for and put it back for more “finishing” even after cutting it open, I decided not to repeat that disappointment and so ended up with more mashed sweet potato than called for—unfortunate since my husband and I decided that ginger and orange juice and maple syrup are not a suitable substitute for massive amounts of brown sugar.

The dressing was iffy from the point where I left the cornbread in the oven for “just a minute more” after the timer buzzed and then completely forgot about it. Although decidedly crisp (and very solid since, as usual, my baking powder was quite outdated), it wasn’t actually burnt, and we decided that, once mixed with a bag of dependable Pepperidge Farm cornbread stuffing, it would be okay, and it was, though it got done sooner than the cookbook led me to expect, and I rather wish I hadn’t included some of the turkey livers I’d cooked for the gravy. Making the gravy with the turkey liver stock was probably a mistake, too. The whole combination tastes entirely too livery (and I’ve concluded I don’t like turkey liver as well as chicken, which I usually use, either).

As it turned out, I managed to screw up the foolproof turkey as well. I’d originally planned to put it in the oven at 4 p.m., but my husband persuaded me to start it at 3:30 instead, assuming it would take longer to cook than advertised. The package had said it should be cooked for 2¼ hours or to an internal temperature of 170°. Unfortunately, what stuck in my head as the time to check on it was 6:15 (based on the original 4:00 start time), and I guess it was ready at 5:45. By 6:15, its internal temperature was 200°, it was falling-apart-tender but also rather dry, and any juices I might have used in the gravy were burnt black at the bottom of the pan. To add insult to injury, when I opened the cooking bag it had come in, I found that on the bottom of the breast (which clearly should have been the top, but it was impossible to tell from the shape—especially when it was frozen solid inside a plastic bag—which side was up) there was a completely unadvertised pop-up timer!

The green bean casserole was, of course, just fine. It’s pretty hard to mess up green bean casserole. In fact, when I talked to our son early yesterday, he commented that he was making green bean casserole for a get-together with his wife’s family, which he found insulting. His wife had volunteered this dish, but he felt insulted because, he said, “A ten-year-old could make green bean casserole.” (I had thought about asking my husband to do this, since it is his “specialty,” but decided against it when I realized he’d completely forgotten about the one task I had assigned to him—getting wine to accompany the meal.)

And of course my pumpkin pie, made from a treasured family recipe, was as good as ever, though we didn’t immediately have room for it and had to defer it till later.

But the whole meal, which took perhaps half an hour to consume, required two full days of preparation, including setting the table with my wedding china (which is stored in dust cases in an upstairs closet and hadn’t seen the light of day in years). It probably took longer to wash up than to eat. Of course, we’ve got all those great leftovers (which required considerable ingenuity to fit into the fridge, Chinese box–fashion).

Still, the experience has given me one more thing to be thankful for—the huge amount of work my mother and mother-in-law so lovingly did for so many years to put a comparable meal on the table every Thanksgiving Day. I’m not sure we ever properly expressed our appreciation for this unrewarded labor of love, so, if you can hear me from where you are, Mother and Mrs. B., THANK YOU!

Will Power Weather

Friday, November 21, 2008,

You folks in/from the Frozen North can snigger all you like (and, yes, you Midwestern snowbirds, I’m talking to you; I’ve seen you out there in your Bermuda shorts), but when the temperature dips below 50° here on the Gulf Coast, especially when the wind is agitating the treetops as it was today, it takes more grit than I can always muster to get me out on the street. It’s so much easier to stay comfortably inside in my flannel nightgown and quilted bathrobe. (In my defense, I have to say that the fickleness of our weather is certainly a factor: when it is 70° one day and 40° the next—I do not exaggerate—we don’t get much chance to acclimate ourselves, and I’m constantly debating what is the ideal attire for today’s outing.) But I did finally go out today—after noon, when the thermometer finally registered 51° or so.

I can’t really say I enjoyed it much. The sun was warm, but the air was still quite chilly, and the wind was cruel. Even though the rest of me warms up quite satisfactorily with the exertion, my hands are still like ice. Partly this is because I have yet to find a pair of gloves that are both heavy enough to be worthwhile and thin and flexible enough to allow me to operate the buttons on my watch, so I was bare-handed.

Aside from the wind and cold, however, it was a glorious day, with a cloudless sky. One can’t help noticing that the holiday season has officially begun. The trees downtown are swathed in strings of miniature lights, and last night was the official “Lighting of the Trees,” which will continue to be lit up at night at least through Mardi Gras. As I walked, I noticed several piles of white powder that had a distinctive cotton candy smell. Given the temperature, I didn’t linger for further analysis, but wild speculation suggested perhaps some kind of fire ant poison heavily laced with sugar? But why now, and why in such widely dispersed locations? A mystery I’ll have to pursue another time, I suppose.

Tomorrow morning I have to be up well before the crack of dawn to leave for a morning meeting several hours up the interstate, so I won’t be walking, which is just as well because the weatherman says it’s going to get very cold tonight (possible hard freeze—I noticed several neighbors had flung sheets over their delicate plants). Sunday is supposed to be milder, which I hope is the case, since it is the day of Fairhope’s annual Open House, when most of the downtown merchants throw open their stores and serve refreshments to all comers in the hope of enticing them to buy. It is the official opening of the Christmas shopping season, and nice weather would be a boon for the shopkeepers in these uncertain economic times.

Blue Angels, Eat Your Hearts Out!

Friday, November 14, 2008,

It was drizzling a little this morning when I got up, so I didn’t get out till about 9 a.m. I spent half an hour edging the front walk before leaving the house, and by that time the sun was well and truly up and making the streets steam. The rising hot air was obviously generating “thermals,” and as I headed down the street toward the bay I simultaneously noticed (a) a neighbor standing in his front yard gazing skyward and (b) what he was looking at: dozens of seagulls soaring above us. While we watched, more flights joined them until they numbered perhaps as many as a hundred.

As they banked and turned in tight circles, I was reminded that the Blue Angels, the U.S. Navy’s Flight Demonstration Squadron, are scheduled to perform at the Naval Air Station in Pensacola (their home base) today and tomorrow. It occurred to me that even if stunt pilots could fly in such close formation, they could not do it in these numbers and certainly not in total silence. How birds achieve this is still a mystery, but it is incredibly beautiful to watch, and I wasn’t surprised to see that everyone I encountered on my walk (as long as they remained in sight) was also looking up.

One person said he didn’t think they looked like our local gulls and wondered if they were migrating, but we both admitted that we hadn’t paid that much attention to what our local gulls look like in flight. To me it just looked like all the local gulls had come out to play, Jonathan Livingston Seagull–fashion, and I was so glad that the timing of my walk had permitted me to see it.

Short Take

Saturday, November 8, 2008,

Today my walking route included a house where a child’s birthday party was being held. As I passed the inflatable castle, I saw a “clown” (striped shirt, multi-colored fright wig) leading a small crowd of short people in the singing of “Old McDonald Had a Farm.” He gripped the shoulders of a child I assume was the birthday boy, encouraging him to sing louder, but he didn’t seem to be getting a lot of support from the other partygoers. There’s no telling how many animals had already been imitated, but they’d reached “Woof, woof,” as I passed and were moving on to “Quack, quack.”

As I drifted out of earshot, I heard what turned out to be their last verse: “Old McDonald had a farm. E-I-E-I-O. And on that farm he had an alligator…” An alligator? Really? (Turns out the sound an alligator makes is “Chomp, chomp.”

Taking Sides

Saturday, November 8, 2008,

I live in a region where people often finish sentences with “Roll Tide!” or “War Eagle!” Since neither of my alma maters (or almae matres, if you prefer) had a football team, I prefer not to take sides on this issue (if pressed to express a preference, I’ll claim allegiance to Vanderbilt University, my father’s school, or Harvard College, my daughter’s), but I am tediously adamant about the “right” side when walking.

I was taught that, in the absence of a sidewalk, pedestrians should walk on the left side, facing traffic. I have some support for this view, actually. The Alabama Driver Manual, published by the Alabama Department of Public Safety, Driver License Division, May 2008 edition, states (p. 63):

PEDESTRIANS MUST:

  • Obey traffic control signals at intersections.
  • Use sidewalks where provided and usable.
  • Walk on the left side of the roadway giving way to oncoming traffic. [Emphasis added]
  • Yield to all vehicles when crossing at points other than within a marked crosswalk or in a crosswalk (extension of the sidewalk) at an intersection.
  • Not stand in the roadway while hitchhiking.

Apparently no one is being taught this any more, as I seem constantly to be dodging pedestrians coming directly toward me on “my” side of the street. Even more annoying, if I am walking on the left and another pedestrian or runner is on the right, a motorist approaching from our rear will go out of his way to swerve away from the other pedestrian and toward me, often forcing me off the road. Between that and dodging cars determined to run me down in crosswalks, walking can be an adventure!

Seen and Not Noticed

Saturday, November 1, 2008,

I grew up in an era when children were supposed to be “seen and not heard.” This meant that we were not supposed to bother grown-ups. If our parents had a dinner party, we might be trotted out for brief introductions, but then we were dismissed to our own realm, having previously been fed in the kitchen. We participated in family dinners, of course, but our opinions still carried less weight than our parents’, no matter how much we might be encouraged to talk. In general, adults lived in their own world, and children were allowed to live in theirs. As long as children behaved themselves, parents and other adults took no notice of them. (And if they did misbehave, then any nearby adult—a friend’s parent, teacher, shopkeeper, policeman—could act in loco parentis without risking indignant protests from the parents: the “it takes a village” concept kicking in.)

In recent years, as I am of course far from the first to observe, parents have become much more obsessed with their children. This may be due partly to having fewer of them (in larger families, older children looked after the younger ones, and we had playmates within the family) and partly to guilt over not “being there” for them. Whether it’s a stay-at-home mom living vicariously through her children (pressed to live out her unfulfilled dreams) or a working mom anxious to spend “quality time” with her children when she can, these mothers (and parents generally) can often smother their kids, overscheduling their lives and leaving them no time for imaginative play.

Yes, these are huge overgeneralizations (and trite ones at that), but I was reminded of this phenomenon on my walk today when I passed three preteens (two boys and a girl) “hanging out” across the street from where I was walking. They didn’t seem to be doing anything in particular, just lounging around in the typically floppy posture of kids who haven’t completely come to terms with their bodies, and talking amongst themselves (I was not close enough to overhear any of their conversation). They have to have seen me (if only because I was calling attention to myself by staring at them for reasons that aren’t important), but they did not acknowledge me in any way, and I returned the favor, avoiding making eye contact and, in short, totally ignoring them.

I reflected that this was surely what they would have wanted. They would want to be ignored, to be left alone to their own devices, to be kids. So I left them safe in the illusion that they were as invisible and insignificant to me as the ants that might cross my path. And if they had even noticed that they were being ignored, I would have hoped that they appreciated it!